Last night I watched a movie about Billie Jean King beating Bobby Riggs at tennis. I probably watched that game as a baby with my Mom, who used to be quite a tennis player herself. The ending to this movie was so hopeful, giving a sense that before that movie, it really was just unheard of that a woman might be able to beat a man in a sport. I got the impression that watching King's skill and training beat that guy's grandstanding and poor sportsmanship at his own game became an inspiration to millions of women, who went on to form their own companies, run for senate, make their own choices. And in that movie the lack of respect for women at that time really came through, a pilot grabbing a stewardess' ass without any thought about how humiliating that might be, or that there could be any consequences. The idea that we could be returning to women being considered second class citizens like that scares me. I've never seen a world where women weren't given equal consideration under the law. And sadly, I'm starting to wonder how likely it is that we're right on the way back to those days right now.

We all knew that whomever Bush chose to replace O'Connor was going to be a white conservative guy* who would be rubbing his hands together in anticipation of overturning Roe v. Wade so the country could get back to the family values of denying women the right to make their own decisions about what they wanted to do with their bodies and make us into the meek, barefoot, church potluck ham and macaroni and cheese casserole-making baby machines God intends us to be. We knew there was going to be some form of good-ol-boy network nepotism.

None of these are a surprise, really. This is what a lot of us were truly afraid of all along. We knew he was going to be nominating Chief Justices. But anticipating something and watching it happen are very different experiences.

In my household this is another argument for Mr. Man's two year long "let's move to the Netherlands" campaign. My father (who is not usually an optimist by any means) likes to talk about the pendulum of American politics - how it swings one way then builds momentum and eventually swings further the other way. He should know, having grown up in the Eisenhower years. Having worked for one of the more conservative corporations for over forty years as a closet Socialist. And I have to admit, I'm starting to look into those good things I've heard about Vancouver, especially after this recent gay marriage bill passing.

All I know is I'm perpetually afraid and finding more and more situations (and tv shows and presidential speeches) that feed my phobias.

Here's a good example: at the kool aid dyeing potluck party there was a woman wearing a "dissent is patriotic" pin on her shirt. I leaned over and whispered that I liked her button and asked where she got it. We started talking about different websites like impeachbush.com and she said I should get a bumpersticker. I told her that we don't put bumperstickers, particularly political ones, on our car because we're afraid that the car will be vandalized or that we would get accosted in a parking lot. I started to say "Isn't it sad that we're living in a time when that seems like a real possibility," but before I even finished my sentence a woman wearing yellow standing on the other side of me said that if she saw a bumpersticker like that on my car she'd shoot my tires out, effectively proving my point. The two women on either side of me started arguing (the "dissent is patriotic" woman kept saying how they should "politely agree to disagree" while the woman in yellow kept harping about Lewinsky and Jesus and her personal friends "The Bushes") and I immediately wished I just hadn't said anything at all.

I have no problem with someone disagreeing with me. To be honest I prefer when they do it in an intelligent manner without namecalling. But, yeah, I have a problem when someone threatens to shoot my fucking tires out if they disagree with my bumpersticker. That just makes *you* look like an asshole and kind of diminishes the liklihood that I'll take your opinion seriously.

So my fears are sometimes warranted. And while I'm not a big fan of either party right now (in fact, I honestly believe that the two-party system serves no purpose other than to keep the status quo) I'm genuinely frightened of Roe v. Wade being overturned. To me it represents more than the legal ability for women to have access to abortions, it shows an entire attitude towards women being able to make their own reproductive decisions, free access to and knowledge of birth control, preventative care, hell just showing a modicum of respect for women having control and knowledge of their own damn bodies without legislation (or self-righteous pharmacists) telling a woman that even if she were raped by her Christian snake-handler father or uncle, even if the prenatal tests showed severe developmental and physical disease, she had to carry that baby to term because very old white Christian lawmakers think their God told them she should.

I know a lot of good Christian people are feeling all put-upon these days because people keep saying mean things about them. And I know that most people who genuinely follow the teachings of Christ are just as appalled by what these crazy few are talking about. I don't have a problem with Christianity itself, I swear it, but I SURE have a problem when people use their religion as a goddamned hammer to control what I can believe in or especially what I can do do with my own body. If I want to tattoo or pierce, infect myself with a disease, or even have a limb removed for no reason I should be able to do so without some asshole telling me I can't.

In the bible there's a whole LOT of discussion on God's gift of free will to man. So if I choose to not follow what your God thinks I shouldn't do, well, that's my choice and I'll take the consequences. You should worry about yours and leave me the hell alone, so to speak.

So here I am feeling completely helpless. What can I do to get my feelings across other than start ugly arguments at knitting guild meetings and post angry fist-shakings on my personal website?

Not a lot because I'm a big lazy chickenshit. But here's an interesting thing I'm going to do to feel better: knit a bunch of uterii and mail them to washington. Well, hell, it's something.

* While people may argue that the justice should be chosen based on his merit not based on his gender or color I can't help thinking about how in a Democratic society the people are supposed to be represented by their supposed peers, not the guy with the best smile, most bullshit and connections, or unlimited funds so he can run ads on prime time local television and campaign endlessly without having to work a real job to support himself and his family. But that doesn't happen. Do you think the people representing us in any form of government (and I'm talking both parties here) have any inkling what it's like to be you? Hell no. So in a country full of people of all kinds of colors and ethnic backgrounds (with different genders and a few different sexual preferences) don't you feel a little spooked that the people who not only make the laws but enforce them are usually straight Christian white men who have no idea what it's like to hold a real job (one of the reasons I wasn't all that super-excited about Kerry either - he was another ivy league child of priviledge who had no idea what it was like to have to deliver pizza) or have to balance a budget? Do you really think that's representative because I sure as hell don't.

Comments

Posted by: jessica at July 21, 2005 10:23 PM

Posted by: Smoking Tongue at July 22, 2005 2:43 PM

Comments are Closed

In order to control comment spam, comments are automatically disabled on entries older than 30 days using Conversation Killer. This entry is over 30 days old so comments are now closed.

If you'd still like to share your thoughts there are several options: You can email me or use the contact form on the sidebar - let me know you want it posted here and I'll include whatever info you want. Or you can visit the most recent post and leave a comment there. Thanks!