So, this was the second hedgehog our vet had ever seen. And they'd never heard of Wobbly Hedgehog Syndrome. I had a feeling they thought we were making it up. But they were really open to taking us in the back and having us show the websites where they could get more information. They weren't entirely comfortable saying this was definitely WHS but even a vet with WHS experience would know there's only one way to tell for sure. By doing an autopsy. They read all the materials and in the meantime had done a few tests.
It turns out she could roll into a ball she was just not scared enough to do it with us. I hadn't seen her form a complete ball in, gosh, a year? I'd thought she just didn't need to all along but the last week I was starting to get worried. So it was nice to know that not only could she still do it but she was comfortable enough with us to not need ball up.
After reading up on the websites we showed them the ladyvet came in and talked about the different ways and causes, which we knew about, of course, because we'd shown them the websites. In a nutshell it's mostly genetic, some think it's related to diet or a trauma. It's a degenerative disease, the symptoms can be staved with certain supplements. I told her about the food I mixed for Zola and how I'd been adding feline missing link to it for the last year or so. And she'd never had any trauma. So that was out.
We did find out that she was blind. That hadn't even occurred to me. She's a nocturnal animal and relies primarily on scent anyway. But to be that small with such a tiny brain and not be able to see must be terrifying. That was what made us decide that she'd had enough.
The vet people were very sensitive about the process. They brought her to us in our room and let us cuddle and say goodbye. She really been enjoying being rubbed from her nose to her headquills and would move her head up to guide my index finger. She was tired though. And we got to see that she wouldn't blink when our fingers came close to her face. But "the hand" was nice and warm as always.
We always joked that while the other pets would call me Mom, Zola just thought of me as "the hand". As in "Oh no there's that hand again" as it would reach into the cage to get her. Or "Oh my god, hand save me!" when she was crawling around in the bathtub. She'd been relying on "the hand" a lot the last few days to eat, drink, and walk, and while there was something sweet in her tired gentleness it was sad to not have her usual grumpy hedgehog mood. Cute grumps are the essence of hedgehogs.
They took her in the back to give her gas before the injection. I'd insisted on that. Then after a few minutes they brought us back there to be with her. She was such a tiny little thing on that big operating table for dogs and cats. The gas mask covered her entire head. Her eyes were half closed and she was on her right side with her belly exposed, left limbs sticking out- as she'd been sleeping a lot these days. They gently gave her a shot in the liver. She didn't flinch. I rubbed her tummy and tiny little paws and she went gently. She was gone in less than a minute and her little fuzzy legs completely relaxed. I was mostly numb. I'd been preparing for this the last few days. Cody had a hard time with it. I think part of that was we were in the same room where he was with Ascii when they put her down. I think it was a lot of things.
We've sent her little body to the state animal coroner (or something like that) for an official necropsy. We'll have official paperwork about whether or not this was Wobbly Hedgehog Syndrome. Then they're sending her back to the vet who will cremate her for us. She'll be in a little box that we can put next to Ascii's big box in the living room.
I have moments where I miss her but I know that we did the best we could for her. I gave her a good home, excellent food, and a good wheel to run on. Two things I think I could've done better: cleaned her cage and clipped her nails more often. That's all. And that's not bad.
We stopped at Border's on the way home. Cody wanted to get some books and I had a DVD being held at the desk. When we were checking out I wandered over to some stuff that looked like jewelry - black corded things with beads. Just looking around. I put my hand on a tangled wad of cords with beads and there was a little brass hedgehog hanging off the cord of something called a "book thong". I quickly untangled it from the mess and told Cody to wait I had something else to buy. It's a black cord with beads on either end and a little hedgehog charm hanging off of one. This was a little gift in memory of my Zola bean.
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Comments
aw, sweet lil Zola. Love & hugs to you, N. You are a great hedgehog mommy.
Posted by: carole at February 10, 2006 3:26 PM
Ohh, poor little Zola! I'm sorry that you've lost your little hedgehog. It sounds like she had the best care and love and led a good life.
Posted by: Pamela at February 10, 2006 3:29 PM
I'm sorry about Miss Zola. I'm really happy I got to meet her. Take care, you guys.
Posted by: Erin at February 10, 2006 3:53 PM
So sorry about little "Zola". Who knows maybe in her next life she will come back as a very large animal with very keen eyesight
Posted by: Ramona at February 10, 2006 3:59 PM
Oh No Noelle. I'm so sorry.
Big hugs to you and Cody.
Posted by: Scout at February 10, 2006 4:34 PM
Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that! I was totally not expecting you would have to go through this today.
*sniff*
I'm teary - your post was wonderful... I'm glad you found that little hedgehog bookmark - a gift from the universe to you for Zola.
*hug*
Posted by: Chris at February 10, 2006 4:37 PM
Oh, I am so very sorry that your little Zola is gone. I'm glad that the vet people were so gentle and understanding. It was a bittersweet read.
Posted by: Gina at February 10, 2006 6:36 PM
Oh, Noelle, I'm so sorry. Zola was lucky to have such loving parents...
Posted by: Beverly at February 10, 2006 10:20 PM
Oh, saying goodbye to a beloved pet is so hard. I'm sorry you had to do that today. She was a cutie, and very loved I'm sure.
Posted by: Amy at February 10, 2006 10:29 PM
I'm so sorry!
Posted by: Wendy at February 11, 2006 9:46 AM
Oh Noelle, I'm sorry. That's a hard decision and a sad loss.
Posted by: cari at February 11, 2006 6:14 PM
Oh Noelle, I am so very sorry about little Zula bean. Your post was so heartfelt (and a bit hard to read...it reminded me of helping Maisy go...she was gone in a minute, too). You are so right that she had a great and loving home with you. You gave her the best life she could have had. She was happy and safe and loved. I really believe our animals feel that. And now she's running around somewhere on strong little legs...
((Hugs))
Posted by: Cheeky Prof at February 12, 2006 12:06 PM
I'm so sorry to hear about Zola. I'm sending you hugs and Conan and Sydney are sending you wet-nose nudges.
Posted by: puppymomma at February 12, 2006 2:44 PM
Rest well little Zola.
Posted by: Carrie at February 12, 2006 6:39 PM
Just have to echo Cheeky's comments. I still remember on a near daily basis the way my Maisy looked into my eyes in the moment following her injection, and believe that she recognized that her pain would be over and in that look said goodbye to me. She went limp in my arms seconds later as Cheeky, the vet, the vet-tech, and I all began to tear-up and was gone very quickly after that. This dog that could've held a grudge against me for the injection of sub-q fluids in the last several months of her life forgave all of it in the very last moments she had. I'll never have another dog like Maisy as you will probably not have another Zola and I don't think I would want it any other way.Thank god we have known the joy of sharing our lives with these beautiful animals. If they were all the same we would never be able to remember them so fondly. It is difficult saying goodbye to our companions but our lives with them are so rewarding that the memories of their loyal companionship are well worth the fleeting pain.
Posted by: j.tonic at February 13, 2006 9:17 AM
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